Omegle

Cumeagle! Chat rooms were the shit, once upon a time. Back in the day, when the internet was still in its infancy, it used to be the best way to stave off boredom. Plus, back before xxx cam sites ruled the land, video chat servers were the best way to find sexy, horny chicks online who might be willing to flash their tits for you if you were lucky. Or, at the very least, provide some halfway decent conversation and a pretty face. Oh, how many hours I must have wasted in chat rooms as a hormonal thirteen-year-old.

My go-to was usually to check out the AOL Instant Messenger chat rooms. Back when that was a thing. Actually, I’m pretty sure they still have it available for a free download, if anyone’s interested in taking a little stroll down nostalgia lane. There weren’t a whole lot of horny chicks in AIM chat rooms. Unfortunately. And I was still too timid at 13 to try and seduce a girl into sending naked pics or anything like that. I did awkwardly stumble into some pretty hot cybering sessions, though. So, it wasn’t all for naught!

The way to go, it turned out, was to use a video chatting site called Omegle. Damn. I really wish someone would have told me that! I completely missed the boat of using Omegle in its prime, sadly. But from what I hear (and from what I see … every once in a while you’ll come across an old recorded Omegle convo in which a sexy chick rubs her clit or flashes her tits) it was a great spot to go and kill a few hours, as well as potentially rub one out with random hot chicks from all around the world.

Did you have to put up with running into a few dicks to find a sexy chick eventually? Well, yeah, but that’s just sort of to be expected with sites like that, isn’t it? The majority of the users are automatically going to be guys, mostly because we don’t really care who sees us rubbing one out, and if it happens to be a beautiful woman who wants to partake in some mutual masturbation, well, that’s a win!

But either way, even in its peak, Omegle was still a gamble. That is completely due to the random way in which Omegle just presents you with someone’s webcam feed. Unfortunately, there was never any way to search or to change settings so that you would only be presented with chicks. I don’t know why they never added in that setting. It seems kind of dumb not to. But, hey, I guess that’s part of the draw to Omegle, isn’t it? The risk. You never know what you’re going to get. I suppose that could be exciting. If what you got wasn’t just penises 75% of the time.

100% Free Randomized Video Chats

Omegle is, surprisingly, still up and running to this day. Shocking, right? Who the fuck would have ever thought they’d still be going? I thought for sure that they would be steamrolled into oblivion by the enormous outpouring of adult camming sites. But then again, Omegle is completely free. And those fucking cam sites can drain your bank account just as quickly as they drain your balls. So, I suppose I can see why there might still be a draw to Omegle. Also, I’m sure some part of it is similar to the only draw that AIM still has: the nostalgia factor. I wonder if there are any chicks who used to go onto Omegle at 18 or 19 and have fun with strangers that still go on now every once in a while, just to relive their glory days.

Well, I guess there’s only one way to find out, isn’t there? I think we’ll have to just mosey on over to Omegle and see what there is to offer. Hopefully, they’ve been able to keep the site up a little better than other chat room sites out there – many of which are just digital ghost towns now … filled with nothing but bots, dudes, spam artists, and, if you listen closely, you’ll hear the extremely faint echo of all the voices that once filled them long ago.

Dated Site Design, Tricky to Locate Adult Section

From the moment you arrive at Omegle’s home page, it will look as if not much maintenance or modernization has been done to the site since its heyday. It still has the same cheesy ass font and color combination (blue and orange … who the fuck thought that would go well together?). The background is a boring beige, and everything on the homepage is crammed into one little box in the center. Here, you will find, inexplicably, an American flag and an announcement that Omegle will work on your phone or tablet without an app. “The website works great on mobile,” it reads. And, honestly, they aren’t lying. I’m impressed at how smooth the site transitioned itself to be mobile-friendly.

There are also frequent warnings about how the video chat is monitored. “Keep it clean,” they urge. Yeah, okay. I’m sure that’s going to happen. But I do understand why they feel the need to include such a proclamation. Omegle has, over the years, developed quite the reputation as being a hotbed for pedophiles and sexual predators. Back in the day, parents were up in arms about this site (as well as others like it). But apparently creepy old men used Omegle to convince underage girls to show their tits or, worse, meet up with them in person. At least they’re finally taking some precautions to vet that shit. In my opinion, though, they should have just tracked down every pedophile by geolocating them and hired an assassin to swiftly and quietly put bullets in the backs of their heads. Nobody would miss them. Fucking pieces of shit.

Nowadays, it looks like you can still access the “adult” or non-moderated sections of the site, but they don’t necessarily make it easy to find. Clicking on “Adult,” takes you to a sort of false landing page which will prompt you to sign up with your email address. Don’t fall for it, though, it’s just so that they can get your info. Instead, you’ll want to click on the “Unmoderated Section.” That’s the real Omegle. And lo and behold, what do I see the minute I click into it?

To Be Expected…

You guessed it. A dick. And not just any dick either. It was a morbidly obese white man with rolls and rolls to spare, sitting awkwardly on a chair, and showing off his micropenis as if it was something to be proud of. It was disgusting and the image will likely haunt me to my grave. Luckily, though, he clicked out of our chat before I could process the disgust of what I was seeing. Shit, I pity the one or two girls on Omegle that will become victim to that visual assault.

As you would probably expect, the more I clicked through cam after cam after cam, the more dicks or shirtless dudes or sweaty fat guys in wife beaters that I saw. There was not a single woman to be found. And that’s really amazing, considering the fact that, when I visited Omegle, the site’s counterclaimed that 19,000+ people were online. I’m sure there had to be at least a few girls in the mix somewhere, right? Probability would seem to require it! But none that I saw. And I certainly was not trying to stick around longer than I had to. There are only so many dicks you can look at before you say, ‘fuck this shit,’ and go to an all-lesbian porn site for a breath of fresh air. [According to my experience on Omegle, I would say that my limit is around 5].

Omegle also offers a text-only chat option, wherein the same randomized stranger element applies … only instead of seeing a barrage of tiny dicks, you just get text. And everyone I encountered on this section was female. Well, kind of. They were also all bots or girls trying to pimp out their premium snap chat accounts. “Kik me at…” one would say and then sign off. “Message me on SC,” another would say and then drop her handle before also quickly signing off. No sign of any real live horny girls, as far as I could tell. So, that’s a disappointment.

You could try Omegle’s newer feature, which allows you to list your interests. Omegle claims that they will, then, pair you up with people who share the same interests. But this also seems futile. Because if you put “sex,” who do you think you’re going to run into again? That’s right, more dudes.

All in all, though, Omegle (often misspelled as "omegal", "omeagle", "omegele", "omgele" and "omegel") could still be a decent way to kill some time like it was back in the day. The only difference is, today, you’ll have a harder time finding chicks to cyber with!