XX-Cel

As I loaded up XX-Cel this morning, I thought I would be whacking off to a porn site about spreadsheets. Office scenarios aren’t too uncommon in the world of premium smut, but this turned out to be another niche entirely. The name isn’t a pun on Microsoft Excel; it’s a play on XXL, a reference to the size of the big, natural tatas you’ll find within. But, of course, XXL may also be a reference to how my cock engorges at the very thought of these well-endowed beauties because I just pulled up the front page, and the thing’s already trying to fight its way out of my pants.

XX-Cel.com is a long-running premium porno site devoted to women with enormous, all-natural boobies. They’ve been putting out booberific smut since 2004, which is a hell of a run for any website. Massive, culture-shifting sites like MySpace have come and gone in the time since, but XX-Cel is still going strong. Hundreds of thousands of visitors still tune in every month, and today I’ll be among them.

How Much Booby Are You Looking for Today?

Older porn sites tend to show their age. So for a website that was born in 2004, XX-Cel doesn’t look nearly as outdated as some of the other surviving paysites of the era. There’s an auto-playing montage at the top of the landing page, similar to what so many big-budget premium joints are putting out front in their smut shops. Scroll down, and you’ll find the expected wall of thumbnails from recent and popular films.

The subject matter is the biggest difference between XX-Cel.com and any random big-name reality porn site. Instead of famous pornstars getting their brains fucked out in cum-drenched threesomes and anal scenes, this site focuses on sexy amateurs with monster jugs. There are a lot of MILFs and thicc hotties, many of them plump enough that they’re nearing BBW territory. Bra sizes are listed right on the thumbnails, which is how I know Faith wears a 32G, Leah Jayne is a 34H, and Joanna weighs in pretty hefty with a 36FF.

There are also a ton of pregnant chicks. The site’s got an entire section full of sluts with massive racks and buns in the oven. Some of them are squirting milk out of their nipples, and others are just showing off their various lady lumps. One truly classy broad, Leila, is puffing on a cigarette while exposing a tummy that looks like a ripe melon about to burst.

I couldn’t help noticing that much of the content out front is relatively softcore stuff by modern porn standards. And while most of the recent videos appear to be solo shows, XX-Cel.com has a nice variety of big boob porno. A couple of newer movies feature pissing, which tells you this isn’t a vanilla website. Flipping through more thumbnails, I quickly find examples of booby sucking, titty fucking, pole smoking, and twat stuffing.

I tried looking for some free previews, but all the XX-Cel “Play” buttons led me to the signup page. The no-previews setup isn’t doing them any favors because I didn’t think there would be any hardcore content until I looked a little harder. To be completely honest, though, I was pretty much sold as soon as I saw all those big naturals. With that in mind, I made my way deeper inside.

XXL Boobs, XS Prices

XX-Cel.com is giving their members an extra-large serving of cleavage with their orders, but they’re charging less for this super-size deal than most paysites. While a non-recurring membership will run you the same thirty bucks most sites charge as their standard rate, the recurring price is $27 and then just twenty bones a month. There’s also a trial that gives you streaming and download access to precisely one video before deciding if you want to keep paying, which is a fair offer.

If you opt for the one-movie trial, you’ve got a serious decision to make. I already mentioned how long XX-Cel.com has been around, and it’s enough time to build up one hell of a collection of big-boob porno. As of this writing, there are around 870 movies in the library. That should keep your hands busy for a while!

The pile is growing at a respectable rate, too. XX-Cel drops a new movie like clockwork every Tuesday. Weekly updates are my golden standard for a paysite, and I always appreciate it when a paysite is working on a predictable schedule. That means you know when to tune in every week for that fresh premium fap you paid for. They even show you some enticing screencaps from upcoming videos, which I’m sure help them keep recurring members. If I cancel now, I’m not going to see the big-titted Devyn Devine in a few days.

One thing I like that I don’t see often is a selection of remastered videos. With sites that have been around as long as this one, you usually have to contend with some really toaster-quality movies that came out years ago. XX-Cel is running some of the older flicks through their futurization machine, so they look better than they did when they originally came out. Unfortunately, they’ve only a small handful of remastered videos so far, but I hope to see them do the same to their full-back catalog.

Is This the Greatest Body Ever?

It can be tough to decide where to begin my fap test with sites this big. In this case, though, I was already eager to see more of this chick I saw in that preview montage on the XX-Cel tour page. I was a little worried I wouldn’t be able to find it in such an expansive catalog, but fortunately, it popped up near the top of the list when I reshuffled the pile by popularity.

Greatest Body Ever was initially released in 2011, but it’s still clearly a big draw. This Czech chick, Sophie Mei, has a smoking body with a set of 32D boobs. The ten-minute video opens with Sophie turning around slowly and smiling pretty for the camera, still wearing clothes, but they hug her body and show off plenty of cleavage. She takes her time teasing the camera, pulling up her shirt and her skirt but not even revealing her full boobies until a few minutes in.

There’s no dialog or music; instead, the video just focuses on the girl and nothing else. It’s a softcore piece by any modern standard of porno, but it’s incredible. Sophie has a couple of more videos on XX-Cel that I’ll definitely be watching. None of her scenes are hardcore, but they’ve gotten me in the mood to watch some other well-endowed girls in some of the site’s harder fare. Before I went looking, though, I saved Greatest Body Ever for my permanent spank bank. Downloads are included with your XX-Cel.com membership, so go ahead and stock up.

Next, I watched a more recent movie called Who’s Smothering Who? Leah Jayne is the huge-jugged star of this one, starring alongside a lucky dude with a Guy Fieri haircut. She sits in his lap, and he gets right to the groping and sucking. Leah’s got this total MILF vibe that has me hard even before the nipples come out. The whole video is ten minutes of jiggly titty worship, perfectly keeping with the site’s theme.

I wanted to see some fucking, though. The exotic BBW giving a tit wank in the thumbnail for Impact XXX caught my eye, and sure enough, it was the most hardcore XX-Cel scene I’d seen yet. This broad, Ines, has absolutely monstrous melons that have got to weigh more than her costar’s head. She sucks his cock, then he wraps it up and fucks her pussy. Check out the scene where she’s kneeling, smoking his pole, with a huge booby resting on each thigh.

You know what, guys? I need to wrap this review up because they’ve got this chick Kerry Marie who looks much like Ella Knox but with a thicker body and bigger breasts. XX-Cel.com exceeded my expectations, so I plan to spend the rest of the evening digging through their catalog with one free hand. They’ve got a stunning array of big-breasted amateurs, and the films do a fantastic job of showcasing their assets. This one’s an easy recommendation for monster boobs and amateur models fans.